NRA Program to Arm Junior High Students; Claims Increased School Security

The NRA program implements a strong mentoring standard. © Сергей Чирков -
The NRA program implements a strong mentoring standard.
© Сергей Чирков –

Waco, TX. The National Rifle Association is kicking off the first of many steps in it’s initiative to arm the Junior High classes of Schumer Middle School. The experimental project, done in conjunction with the local school board, is a first in the nation. It’s been kept largely under wraps due to the threats of violence from the opponents of the plan. Today, however, the NRA has released it’s plans which are to go into effect within the week.

Wayne LaPierre, the President of the NRA, explained the plan to arm the seventh and eighth grades of Schumer Middle School in Waco, Texas. “We plan on giving each male member of the middle school a Smith & Wesson M&P .22 LR Assault style rifle. Each rifle will be well outfitted with holographic sights and thirty round clips. We save no expense when it comes to our children’s safety. The NRA will also implement it’s top grade training program to teach each and every male child the fundamentals of handling a rifle. We have an exemplary safety curriculum.”

A student of Schumer Middle School trains with a paintball gun. © Pavel Losevsky -
A student of Schumer Middle School trains with a paintball gun.
© Pavel Losevsky –

When asked what the purpose of giving assault rifles to children, LaPierre replied: “Police take time to get there. Security guards cannot be everywhere at once. The best bet is arming the targets of the possible violence. This will make the barbarians who want to hurt our precious children think twice before they burst through the doors shooting.” He added, “These children are old enough to go hunting with parents supervision. We feel they have the right to defend themselves against classmates who would want to do them harm. We give them sex education, why can’t we train them in the traditional values of America? Values like freedom, integrity, and marksmanship.”

The teachers would also be trained extensively in marksmanship and gun safety. “It’s important to have a good mentor program,” Lapierre said.

Not everyone agrees with this method. Donna DeDee’s, the organizer of the Million Mom March, claims that more guns are not the answer. “Why are we giving a bunch of teenage kids the same weapons our soldiers have? This is insanity. We need to implement wider gun free zones. Look at how many soldiers were killed in Iraq. Simply put, without guns there would be a lot more soldiers living today.”

DeDee also wonders, “Where will the money to purchase the guns come from?”

Donald Lantz is a native of Waco, Texas. He is in favor of this bill and has been vocal in his support. He says that the rifle isn’t an issue for his son. “I love this idea, my son already owns several AR-15’s. He could just grab one on his way out. The school won’t have to buy his.”

Rebecca Sherman agree’s with Donald. “We could have cookie sales to raise the money for the rifles, ” She says. “We already do it with the football program. People around here love guns more than football so I don’t think the money would be an issue.”

Although the program is already underway, President Barack Obama has filed suit with the school district in an attempt to dissuade them from undertaking the NRA’s initiative. “We cannot let these madmen and extortionist’s have their way with these innocent children,” President Obama said early Monday morning, “This cannot be allowed to happen. We will not stop until every gun is taken from their ridiculously small hands.”

Texas governor Rick Perry responded to President Obama’s statements by saying, “I think I speak for Texans everywhere when I say, come and take them!”

This ad displays the rifle that will become standard issue for every seventh and eight grade male Schumer Middle School student.
-photo via

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